Life Priorities (Julie Jorgensen)
Life seems to go at a pretty hectic pace and it’s not very often that we stop and consider whether it is going in the direction we want. With everyone getting the same amount of time, the only thing about that that we can control is how we spend it.
I’ve been spending plenty of time of late talking to both social and elite athletes, colleagues and friends discussing life, sport, and career goals. It is amazing how often we are not super clear within ourselves of what these things are. Or, we have an idea of what it is that we are after, but we are not confident that we are doing everything in our power to achieve it.
How often do we hear people say “I have to do…OR I must… OR I’ve got to do…”
These must be some of the frustrating starts to any sentence I’ve heard, and yes I’ve been known to use them myself from time to time.
Everything we do is a choice, and an action we make knowing that that choice has a consequence….
For example:
I’ve got to get up at 5am to go training – really? Why? Who says? For what purpose?
I have to go and see my Nana this weekend – why? Who is making you?
I have to work a 10 hour day or the job won’t get done – What happens if you don’t?
Why are we not able to say:
“I want to go to work this weekend and get some things done so I’m less stressed during the week”
“I want to get up at 5.30 am and exercise, It invigorates my day”
“I want to not train today and spend time with my family”
If we can use more of this language in our day to day lives we begin to feel more empowered about the decisions we make and more conscious that they reflect our life choices.
Your life choices are the things you prioritise in your life having a big impact on your satisfaction, enjoyment and reward. By understanding your priorities and then living them you are accepting the consequences of your choices.
IE if work is your number one priority, then you have to accept the consequences (good and bad) that come with this – i.e more income, career advancement, but time away from doing other things etc
How do you figure out what your priorities are? Jot down in a mind map (see picture) all the things you choose to do in your life (remembering that everything is a choice) and the things that are important to you. It might include things like
• Work• Family
• Faith
• Friends
• Study
• Writing / reading / relaxing
• Home
• Time out for self
• Exercise
• Health
Then put them in the order of priority for you. IE What are the most important things for you?
When I did this exercise, I realised that health was a high priority and yet I was doing 4-5 other things above my health all the time – ie late nights, not exercising, working more, not eating well. It’s easy to beat yourself up when you get stuck in this situation. You end up in constant conflict with the choices you make. Once I started making more conscious decisions based on the things that were important to me, I realised I was the one that had control over this success, and I was accountable for not achieving the goals I had. I couldn’t hide behind the statement “I have to…”
It is the same for athletes. Athletes have a goal of achieving in their sport – it could be a world championship title, an Olympic medal or making a national team. If that is your number one priority then everything else fits in around it. If your time begins to not reflect this and you start spending more time choosing other things first (could be time with friends rather than training, family holidays or events, working to sustain a certain lifestyle) then you have to accept that it is going to have an impact on your first priority.
It doesn’t have to be a bad thing - just know that it will have an impact and that is a choice that you make.
“Coach wants me to train in Wellington, I want to live in Christchurch with my family”
“I want to train at 10am, but I also want to work part time from 9-3 in between my sport”
“I have university exams just two weeks before a major sporting event, do I train or study or both? ”
What is the impact of these decision that are made?
No wonder athletes often feel like they are being pulled in different directions. Understanding what is important to you helps you stand up and be confident about the decisions you are making.
Have a go at the exercise mentioned above and reflect in a few weeks time. Have you made any changes that made a difference?
Please let us know how you get on – just comment in the box below…
